Take a deep breath...

my kitchen.... wow.

the ceiling in my kitchen. They are reworking the pipes so that we can raise the ceiling.

Another shot of my kitchen... there is a ladder and the vanity to the upstairs bathroom!

Kaylen was sitting all of her backyardagain creatures on the stairs and posed in front of them for me. She wanted me to take her picture... first time ever!

My garage. notice where the doors should be... there are windows and a sliding glass door. Nevermind all of the junk in the middle... just wait...

check out the walls in the garage! A guy is working on all of this right now.

Another view of the kitchen and you can see all of our junk just piled up! We cant find ANYTHING!!!!

Here is my one lone toilet. Pretty yucky. At least I can potty (can you tell I have a toddler?) and brush my teeth and wash my hands!

This is upstairs in the bonus room. It is soooo messy - we have no closets (i will explain why in a min)! And this picture is out of order and I am too lazy to move it around... so we will go back downstairs for the more pics before coming back upstairs.

This is the living room. The only area in the house that doesnt make you want to cry. I am going to do a mocha glaze on the cabinets and I have all new hardware to add. We are going to get a new mantle for christmas and then we will change out that silly gold insert. BTW... all my plants and flowers wont stay there... just dont have anywhere else to put them right now.

This is the office to be. Right now it is full of stuff (as is everything!) I cant wait to get things somewhat organized!

Another view of the office. This room will be rather cozy when it is done. I think we will spend a good bit of time in here since Allen is always doing work on the computer.

This is the dining room. Other than organizing it and cleaning it out, there isnt a ton to be done in here. A chair railing type thing but that is it!

This is going to be Kaylen's room but right now it has a ton of stuff in it!!! Noticing a theme here? Maybe complete chaos?

This is Kaylen's second closet that they are adding. Going to be great!

The other side of Kaylen's closet in the bonus room. We just moved the door.

This is the bonus room. Oh my!!! Every time I walk in here... I walk out. This room is so packed to the brim. We dont have closets so our clothes are strewn out everywhere!

Okay, closet explaination... 1. the master closet and kaylen's closet are having doors moved and cant be used. So I put my clothes in this closet noticing before that the far left side wasnt really attached... in the middle of the night i heard a loud crash... this is what I found. Allen had the closet in the bonus room but in the process of the move a few large heavy objects blocked off the entrance, like the air hockey table and two matteresses!!! So we literally have NO closets!

This is where we are sleeping in the guest bedroom. We had to move all of our really heavy furniture in here and we will have to eventually move it into our room :(.

This is where we should be bathing by Monday... anyone else concerned?

Another shot of where the vanity is supposed to go... yikes!

And the last image of our scary bathroom that is our only hope of normalcy!!!

This is where our master closet door used to be and the door to storage...

This is where they are now. I hope this is done soon so we can move our stuff into it!

This is the other side of our master... the built-ins will be in the new bathroom when it is done. So that gives you an idea of how we are expanding the bathroom.

Check out the master shower right now. What a scary dungeon!

The current vanity in there... nice!

The front of my house.. dumpster and all! notice the shingle falling off of the roof - classy! We will be doing architectural shingles on the new roof!

The front steps in the beginning stages. We are flagstoning the steps. They will be cool when they are done!

The side of the house... can you say sanford and sons? No wonder we havent met our neighbors - they hate us for making this house look worse than it already did!

There goes all of our pipes to our house!

Yes. that is a truck in my backyard! I told you I was getto-ing this place out! That belongs to the tree guys that are cutting down a few trees for us. We are hoping to clear it out enough to get some grass to grow!

And this is just a shot of my leaf yard! Have you ever seen so many leaves!?!?! yikes! Good thing allen got a backpack leaf blower - he is going to need it!

This fixture plus the globes below will go in the downstairs bathroom.

This is the vanity for the downstairs bathroom.

This picture below is of the vanity in Kaylen's bathroom but it will be a little longer and have 2 sinks. Also there is a sample of what the top of the sink will look like.


This is an example of the type of knob that will go on the kitchen doors... not exact but you can get the idea.

I think this is the dishwasher. Nothing special... just a dishwasher.

This is the refridgerator. The cool thing about this is that it is counterdepth... so it will be in line with my counters!!!

Okay, this is my over-the-range microwave that is also a convection oven for when I am cooking for big crowds and need a second oven.

This is my convection oven... I love it!!!

Here is an example of my cabinet drawer pulls. It isnt the exact one but you get the idea.

MOVING

I haven't talked about this on my blog all that much but we are moving tomorrow. Mixed emotions - for sure! I am starting to get excited about the new house but it is going to be a very long process. We are moving on to the golf course and closer to my work. So it is good for both Allen and me. The house is bigger than our old house so we can grow into it if we are blessed with more children in the future. There are 4 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms. 2 story. All bedrooms are upstairs. This is a major renovation project! We will be moving into this place tomorrow. Will we have a shower? not exactly. There has to be tile around the walls, faucets, drains, all of that for a shower to work. ugh! So I guess I will be forced to go to the gym and workout before work just so I can shower!

Now, you would think that a kitchen would be necessary to sustain life... not for the Wilsons! We wont have a kitchen until the middle of Jan. But let me tell you, this kitchen is going to be awesome when it is finished. Since I hate to do posts without pictures, I have a few pictures of the drawings of the new kitchen. There have been a few modifications... we now have decorative wooden "valences" as a part of the cabinets. Know what I mean?


Here is the door color: It is a taupe glaze, distressed door.

Time in the Tub

I know... the dreaded bathtub pictures. I really didn't think I would disgrace my little one this way but I couldn't pass it up. (I tried really hard to keep these G rated.) This is her favorite part of the day and she has so many tricks! We will definitely be trying to swim this summer! In the first picture she is blowing bubbles... hence the water ripples below... She is so proud of herself!

In this one she is "getting her hair wet". We are trying to teach her to put her head in as much as possible. She is also laying on her back and the water goes right up to her eyes. She isn't scared! I didn't take a pic of that because I wanted her to stay covered. Dont want any embarrassing pics!

Kaylen's recital and more!

It has been a while since I have posted pics of my sweet Kaylen. So today I have a second to do just that! The first two are from her Christmas recital this weekend. She hadn't slept well the night before so she wasn't herself for the show. Of course she was still adorable! The pics of her during the show are too dark and too far away but you can at least see how cute she looked in her Christmas dress!




The next two pictures are of Kaylen at the Huntsville football game. She absolutely loves going to these hometown games where the band plays! She just dances and dances. It is really a lot of fun.



This is just a shot of Kaylen looking cute so I thought I would throw it in!

Turner Syndrome

So the doctors did a test on the baby that was. We found out that there was a genetic defect. Instead of 46 chromosomes there were 45. We were missing an x in there! The good news is that this isnt the type of genetic defect that repeats itself. It is a fluke and every other mom to be has just as much chance of that happening to them as I do. So a couple of things that this means: 1. I think that this only happens to girls (based on the reading I've done) so that means we were having a little girl. and 2. this mostly effects the physical attributes of a person. So our baby would have a normal intelligence but would look physically different. The main thing that occurs is that height is stunted. The average height of a Turner Syndrome baby is 4'8". Also it typically effects her female organs. She wouldnt develop or ever go through puberity. This causes lots of problems for her besides the fact that she could never have children. I am just so thankful to God that my little girl didnt have to go through all of that. I would hate to have 2 daughters close in age and one looked like a normal, pretty little girl and then her sister looked different. (there are also other physical defects). That just seems like a lot of heartache for the unborn. I think God is so gracious to my little one to not make her have to go through that. I guess you never know how you would be until you are in the situation but I am not sure that I would be able to treat my kids fairly if this baby would have lived. I am sure you all think I am a horrible person for saying that. I feel horrible for thinking that. I would hope that I would but I am just not honestly sure. Thankfully I am not being tested in that way. I feel such closure in knowing the reasons why and can thank God for looking out for me and my children. I am so grateful for things working out the way they have. I am sad that there was a problem with my little one and she wont be joining us but am so glad that she doesnt have to live a life of pain and sorrow. This will probably be my last non picture post... it is so unlike me!!!! I dont think I will be posting about this miscarriage anymore either. Not that I plan to forget her but I plan to begin this new path God has given me. I am so excited about taking a year off and being finished with my Masters and being settled in our new place. All of those things seem so far away yet so near. The next pregnancy will be here before you know it!!! Thanks again for all of your encouragement!

Ringling Brothers Barnum and Bailey Circus!!!

Who doesnt love the circus??!?!?! They are at the VBC Nov. 29 - Dec. 2. We are going on Thursday because tickets are half price. Let me know if you are going on Thursday and we will look for you!!!

Kaylen's new blog!!!!

Okay, so I decided to make life easier for our family members who are trying to buy christmas and birthday gifts for my little one. I have been working on this blog for a few days. I am running out of ideas for stores. I looked over Gymboree, The Children's Place and Crazy 8 (Emily told me about this new store) but didn't really like anything there right now. You guys have any suggestions for me? Check it out and if you know of any other good websites let me know!!!

www.kaylenwilson.blogspot.com

Halloween 2007

We go to Willowbrook Baptist's Trunk or Treat every year and it is always a blast. Kaylen loves playing on the blow ups! She was a little under the weather so she didnt last but an hour or so but while she was there she had a blast!!!! She was the cutest little duck ever!!!!

Kaylen and the Acrylic Paint

I have been wanting to put this on here for awhile but haven't been able to find my camera. Well, I found it just in time for Halloween! So before I post my Halloween pics I wanted to show everyone exactly what my little scutter did! She was being awfully quiet in the spare bedroom with me (I was filling out paperwork for her new Mothers Day Out Program). I turned around to see what she was doing and she had that little index finger as far down in the red acrylic paint bottle as she could get it! Then she took that finger out and started rubbing it all over her face! I was so mad but relieved at the same time that it was only on her and not on my carpet, white bedspread, etc. So we took a pic and put her in the bathtub. The outfit is ruined but it is the end of the season and it has her initials on it so - who cares! :)

What have I learned?

I felt like I should spend a litte time talking about what I have been going through emotionally with this miscarriage. This discussion wont be overly postive and I hope not negative either. Just honest and real.

First of all, I had the D&C on Thursday and everything went great. I had no problems at all with the proceedure. It was relatively painless. I can tell that I am more tired than normal and have felt some pain in picking up Kaylen and carrying her around. (wouldnt you know that she has been all about me and wanting only me to hold her!)

Anyway, I have been reflecting a bit on all of this and here is what God has taught me: I am not invincible!!!! I know in my head that life is a gift and is so fragile but for whatever reason you think that means for everyone else that you know. Why is it that we always hear of hardships with getting pregnant, having a healthy pregnancy, having a healthy baby, and so on but we think... that is awful for that person, I truly hurt for them... but I am glad that having kids is easy for me! See, no one in my family (and my mom has 6 sisters) has really had that much trouble having kids. And as I think about it... maybe they have had their struggles. But until this, I didnt know about them and I just thought people in my family were immune (if you will) to strife of this kind. Dont get me wrong, we have our own issues but having babies wasnt one of them! Boy have I been humbled right out of my arrogance! There isnt anything that I am above. God promises us nothing. And He often times uses hardships to build character. I have so many friends that have gone through or are going through a hard time even conceiving. I hurt for them on a whole new level. Yes it hurts to lose a baby and you ask yourself so many questions, like did I let Kaylen jump on my belly too much? Was I too stressed to carry the baby? And so on... But the pain is instant and there is closure. I cant imagine going through hurt like this monthly. I have always prayed for these friends and ached for them to be blessed with a child. But now I have a bit of a glimpse of what they are feeling. Let me tell you... they are hurting. Some of them for years. Silently hurting. There is nothing we can personally do to ease their pain but love them and pray for them. Anytime you are dealing with new life or children, in general, there is such pain. Ache trying to conceive, worry that you wont be able to carry, and tons of fret that they will be healthy. I cant fathom (at all) what my friends who are pregnant and know there is a major issue with their baby are going through. Wow. I have no words. All I know is God must know their strength and think that it is incredible. Life is just extremely fragile and there is strife in every part of the process of becoming and being a parent. It doesnt end. God is really smart. He knows we need a constant reminder that we need Him every second. Because we are such an arrogant people, we need constant humbling. Bottomline: new life is a gift. a miracle. The fact that God has blessed me with it once is such an honor that I am eternally grateful for. I pray that I am able to have more but will praise God regardless.

One last thing... It is in times like these that I am reminded how blessed I truly am. It has been healing for me to talk about what I am going through and I have had so many good friends that have been so encouraging. I cant tell you how much you have meant to me. Just a few things that people have done: one dear friend came to my house and left food in it while I was in the hospital. Would you believe that at 10 pm when I got home, I was starving! It was amazing to have a warm meal sitting there waiting on me. A group of dear friends gave me a gift card to the spa!!!!!! How lucky am I? Then a group in my neighborhood got together and made me dinner on sat. night. I have gotten cards, flowers, and most importantly lots of encouraging words through email and phone calls. I know you have all been praying for me - I have felt it. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Please know that you have touched me and helped me through a difficult time. I hope I can be as good of a friend to each and every one of you as you have been to me. You have set the bar high! I am blessed.

My Miscarriage

Most of you know that I am pregnant. And because of that I wanted to put this on my blog for everyone (mostly so I dont have to say it a million times).

I went in for my first ultrasound yesterday and the baby measured 9 weeks. The baby looked great except for the fact that there was no heartbeat and no bloodflow in the umbilical cord. The doctor said that the heart had to have just stoped beating for me to measure as big as I did and that after a baby passes the tissues swell a bit (accounts for the extra week in size). So, tomorrow (hopefully) I will go in for a DNC.

The biggest thing is that I dont want any of you to feel sad for me. God has been so good to me to bless me with a beautiful daughter. I feel certain that He will bless me again. Also, I have no clue what He is keeping me or my unborn from. I would hate to have to watch my child suffer a lifetime of a disability. I am thankful that I lost the baby so early on and dont have to go through this after an entire pregnancy. On top of all of that, when I do try to have a baby again I will be tenured and have my masters - SHEW! So no more classes and I can take a year off with my baby! We will also be settled in our new house and I dont have to worry about the dust and paint fumes! So I can totally see God at work and am grateful that he is allowing me to go through this now -instead of later!

One little way that God was preparing me for this: I called about a mothers day out program for Kaylen last week and as the lady was telling me about the program she had to call me back because her doctor's office calling and she needed to schedule a DNC because she had just miscarried. (Why she told me all of that - I dont know!) But then she called me back and she had such a peace about the whole thing and it was so encouraging to hear her speak. I know that God put her in my life last week to prepare me for this week. I am very blessed to be so loved and cared for.

I also have amazing friends and family - all of you. Thank you for being such a wonderful support system for me! I am truly thankful for each and every one of you. If you think about it, please say a prayer for me tomorrow as I go in for my DNC - I am a little scared because I have no idea what it will be like. I dont think it will be bad... it is just the unknown. Anyway, I love you all and hope that you have a wonderful weekend!

more disney, more kaylen

This is kaylen at the petting zoo that is in the Animal Kindgom. She really was interested in the billie goats! Notice how she is playing with his beard?!?!

This is where Kaylen was perched most of the trip. She could see for miles up there! And it was so cute how she held on to Allen's head the whole time. She would play with his hair.

Kaylen got her face painted one day... doesn't she look adorable?!?! She sat so still while they worked on her face. I was so proud of her!

Look how excited she is with Pooh? Man, does she ever love him! It was really fun to see her get so excited.

Okay, it doesnt get any cuter that this!!! She is about to explode with excitement! I love how her eyes are squeezed shut!!!