Monday, November 05, 2007

Turner Syndrome

So the doctors did a test on the baby that was. We found out that there was a genetic defect. Instead of 46 chromosomes there were 45. We were missing an x in there! The good news is that this isnt the type of genetic defect that repeats itself. It is a fluke and every other mom to be has just as much chance of that happening to them as I do. So a couple of things that this means: 1. I think that this only happens to girls (based on the reading I've done) so that means we were having a little girl. and 2. this mostly effects the physical attributes of a person. So our baby would have a normal intelligence but would look physically different. The main thing that occurs is that height is stunted. The average height of a Turner Syndrome baby is 4'8". Also it typically effects her female organs. She wouldnt develop or ever go through puberity. This causes lots of problems for her besides the fact that she could never have children. I am just so thankful to God that my little girl didnt have to go through all of that. I would hate to have 2 daughters close in age and one looked like a normal, pretty little girl and then her sister looked different. (there are also other physical defects). That just seems like a lot of heartache for the unborn. I think God is so gracious to my little one to not make her have to go through that. I guess you never know how you would be until you are in the situation but I am not sure that I would be able to treat my kids fairly if this baby would have lived. I am sure you all think I am a horrible person for saying that. I feel horrible for thinking that. I would hope that I would but I am just not honestly sure. Thankfully I am not being tested in that way. I feel such closure in knowing the reasons why and can thank God for looking out for me and my children. I am so grateful for things working out the way they have. I am sad that there was a problem with my little one and she wont be joining us but am so glad that she doesnt have to live a life of pain and sorrow. This will probably be my last non picture post... it is so unlike me!!!! I dont think I will be posting about this miscarriage anymore either. Not that I plan to forget her but I plan to begin this new path God has given me. I am so excited about taking a year off and being finished with my Masters and being settled in our new place. All of those things seem so far away yet so near. The next pregnancy will be here before you know it!!! Thanks again for all of your encouragement!


Jodi said...

There is no doubt in my mind that you would have been perfectly fair AND loving to both girls! She would have been lucky to have you!

Heather Lee said...

I certainly don't think you are horrible for saying that. It is an honest answer to an unknown question, but I agree with your previous poster, I believe you would be a fantastic mommy to all your babies. Take care and glad to hear you are doing well:)